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Mum

I have been struggling with the mental load of being a mum. I work full time as a physical therapist. I have a 16 month old son who is, by all standards, an 'easy' baby. He is in daycare full time and I send his food with him since he has a dairy intolerance and we have opted to try to keep him plant-based for the time being.

All the prep work around daycare plus the daily stuff like cleaning and cooking have become rather overwhelming. My husband tries to help but he doesn’t get that it isn’t just the action that makes something difficult. He underestimates the planning 'stress' involved with daily life.

I'm mostly looking to see if you have any insights or stress management techniques that may be helpful. I run three days a week which does help (until that time of running makes me stressed about not doing something else productive).

You definitely have a lot going on and I’m not surprised your mental load is getting maxed out, but you don’t have to do it all.

I’m wondering if there are any things you can ‘let go of’ or give others to do. For example, can you have a cleaner come in? Can you give your husband complete control over somethings? Or maybe you can go through the tasks with your husband and make a list of who is in charge of what and who is the helper. For example, maybe you make the list of meals to prepare but he prepares them. Or you do the laundry but he folds and puts it away.

Jodi, Tinto Expert