Introducing baby one to baby two can be really difficult. Not only has your oldest somehow transformed into an actual gigantic real child in the space of a day or two, but they may come out with delightful phrases such as ‘can we send him back now?’, which make it feel like you've just been punched in the heart. Ahh, good times.
Anyhow, here are our top tips for a smooth (ish) transition.
1. Play the long game
Remember that it’s not just about that very first meeting. It’s important, of course. But we'd suggest that you take that small amount of energy you'll have and instead spread it into a smaller but consistent layer over the first few weeks instead. No one wants a hyped up child one day and a jealous wreck the next.
2. Presence over presents
Lots of guides will suggest you get your bigger one a present for the little one to ‘give’ them upon meeting. And there's nothing wrong with that approach. But the key thing to remember is that a gift cannot be used as a substitute for what your little one really craves: you.
3. Respect your child’s feelings
Your child might still be small, but they can and will have very big and very real feelings about their new sibling and new role in the family that should be taken seriously. If they don't want to hold the baby, don't ask again for a while. If they seem angry with you, try to conceal that shattering heart as much as possible and accept what they're telling you wholly.
Know that your child will adjust eventually. So try not to compare your family to anyone’s else’s, and give your little crew time.