Second infertility is when you struggle to become pregnant or carry to term after having a baby previously.
Unfortunately, secondary infertility often comes with its very own brand of shame. In particular, couples are often told to ‘just be grateful for the child you have’. But let’s make this very clear: you have every right to feel very sad (or angry, or anything really…) about not currently having the family you always imagined.
The good news is that the vast majority of people who experience secondary infertility end up having a baby. Mostly, people experience secondary infertility because they’re older than they were the first time round, rather than for any major medical reasons.
So, when should you do something about it? The rule of thumb is that if you’re under 35, see your doctor after a year of trying, whereas if you’re 35 or older then you should go at six months.
But it’s really a more personal decision than that, and the impact any kind of infertility can have on our mental health should not be underestimated.
Bear in mind that there’s a difference between being evaluated and being treated. So this means that you can go and speak to your doctor about your fertility whenever you like, it might just be harder to get treatment before the six or 12 month mark. Everyone’s different, so make the decision that’s right for you.